here I am once again...
trying to get some relieve for this troubled mind which has developed, contrary, to what I was expecting.
so, basically I've come to the point where I find it way too hard to believe everything that she says...
I think there might be something going on, I hope there isn't, but still, I need to find peace of mind.
but I can't.
how could I even try to find 'mind' if she's left me without one?
I'll just try to carry on, with the blind faith I have in her, not doubting, not asking, just believing, and just turning my gaze in another direction... any direction which is not her eyes, her mind, the truth...
I'm afraid.... I need to believe her.
